"In every life, a little rain must fall."Recently, there were some issues in my marriage, and let me tell you--a little rain doesn't even begin to cover what happened to me, my life, and my husband. I won't get into too many personal details because I prefer not to have every aspect of my private life on the internet, but I will say this: after 23 months of marriage, my husband and I nearly split up.-magazine ad
Yes, it was that serious of an issue, and you're probably wondering, "Well, if it was that serious, why did you stay?" There are several reasons for such a decision. My parents went through a similar issue in their marriage. Twice. The first time was my dad, and the second time was my mom. Another reason I chose to stay waas because of my husband's grandmother and mother. His grandmother also went through such an issue, but hers crossed family lines because it dealt with her husband (not related to my husband except by marriage) and her daughter-in-law. At the time, I personally felt that would've been enough for me to say goodbye.
My mother-in-law also played a part in this because my husband tells her mostly everything, including recent discussions with me regarding taking a break in our marriage. After all, we met young, have only ever had sex with each other, and had a child young. His childhood is basically over, and he's three years younger than me. His mother and other family members held an intervention suggesting that he stay with me. When he told me they were doing that, I was truly touched.
In regards to the issue that occurred, allow me to clarify just a couple of things:
- There was no sex involved. Considering the woman who started the issues lives in Wisconsin or some other place far from California, that would've been impossible.
- He was warned at the beginning of our marriage that even contacting said woman would be considered cheating because of his strong feelings for her.
- This is the sixth time we've had an issue with the same woman, a woman my husband has never met in person yet frequently flocks back to whenever there are problems with me.
- A few days after we were married, I contacted this woman and asked her to stop contacting my husband. She tried to fight it but eventually went away. I thought everything would be fine after that.
Now, back to the quote from the beginning of this blog post. Basically, what I understood from the quote is this: Shit happens, and we can either flee from it, or we can take a deep breath, hold that breath, and clean up that shit. (I suggest rubber gloves, a gas mask, and perhaps some bleach.) So, yeah, I was recently struck by a thunderstorm in life, but it wasn't a tsunami. I made it through beaten up and a little scarred, but I'm making my way again.
This blog post was first written in my journal as a rough draft
